I'm having a brain fart and can't think of the word I want to use instead of "thinking's". So bare with me.
This year Mother's day felt different than any other year. Prolly 'cause life is always changing and I've never been in "this" place before. I'm gonna do my best to relay some of the thought processes behind my thinking's, without going into storytelling mode. (or is that the purpose of this thing?) (well, I'll just say I'm gonna try and focus more on getting all of my specific thoughts shared as well as the thought processes without sharing about all of the rabbit trails that lead me to those thoughts) (Ok.. starting now.)
I felt a need/desire to show my mom that I appreciate and love her. More so than ever before.
Process that lead to the thought:
This is the second Mother's Day that I've spent missing my Mother-in-law. I don't know how many more I'll have with my dear Mother. I don't want to waste precious time or have regrets. This isn't as morbid as it may seem. It is just a harsh reality I've been faced with. My Mother lost her Mother when she was about my age. You don't go through life expecting these things that happen to everyone to happen to you. They just do.
I am SO thankful that I have the honor of being a mother. I want to spend this time relishing that honor and working to enjoy every aspect of it.. even the difficult ones.
Process that lead to the thought:
This last Thursday a family in our community lost their child to Leukemia. I believe he was about 10yrs old. I cannot fathom the pain that this must cause nor the strength the Lord must endow to make it through this. Let alone to do it in the manner of upholding His name and trusting Him and honoring Him through all of the pain and sorrow of it all that these parents did it in. It truly is a testament to His faithfulness. I know, as a parent, their strength had to have come through Him. Again, this isn't as morbid as it may look. It's just a reality I've been shown.
I don't think I mind planning things for my family to do today. I think I can enjoy it and be glad in it. I have so much to be thankful for that being "in charge" of the days festivities can be a symbol of my thankfulness. A way for me to not only bring honor to my own mom, but to honor my husband for all that he does. All that he daily offers me.
Process behind thought:
My hubby was gonna be camping from Thursday through today. So, it was up to me to decide to sit home with the girls or take the opportunity and show my mom how much she means to me by honoring her in some way. And in my mind honoring her goes hand in hand with either making her food to eat or buying her food to eat. So, going out to lunch seemed like a great way to do that.
Thought: I'm really stoked and feel like a grown-up taking my parents out to lunch.
Process(es) behind thought:
a) My dad has always done his best to make me feel special on days that were meant to do that. Two that stick out to me are Valentine's day and as an adult, Mother's Day. I always felt special receiving the Carnations and heart candy or thoughtful card that maybe he bought or maybe my mom bought.. but he rarely just signed "Dad". He's done a great job showing me he loves me and is proud of me. He's also done a good job of "supporting" me even after I married. Either by taking all of us out to steak dinner to celebrate his raise or paying for me to go to retreat or allowing my husband, baby and me to move in with him so that my husband could go to school and get an amazing job. He's done all of that and more.
b) My mom has always been a good advocate to my dad to get him to provide things like steak dinner and whatnot to me and mine. :) Also, she's cooked and baked and crafted so many things for me and my family to show us her love. I've been so crazy in the head since having children, and life has been so totally consumed with their day to day needs, that I've not been very good at reciprocating much of that. I may have even had a little attitude once and again about why I should not be expected to do anything other than take care of the needs of my little immediate family. Again, I've never been where I am before. Life is amazing with all of it's "seasons" and "hurdles" and "ruts" and "mountain top experiences".. what a ride!
3. :) I am having more and more moments of clarity in my day to day life. I feel that I am getting ahead of the game in several departments in the tasks that make up my "Responsibility Chart". I can now have free brain space to think "outside the box". Thinking of others and trying not to spend too much time feeling like dung for not thinking of it sooner.
IV- We have paid off our financial debts and are at a place where we can share the blessings God has bestowed on us without neglecting to pay off our debtors. THIS, is a testament to God's continued faithfulness in our life no matter that we've faltered in our faithfulness to Him. It makes me happy and sad all at the same time to say that. :)( (that looks like jumping jacks)
Ok.. so that was a bit rabbit trail-ish. Pardon me... please.
So, basically. This was my favorite Mother's day yet. We went to California Pizza Kitchen. My hubby and boys ended up coming home early and so being able to go with us today! My sister and her family were able to join us in celebrating this blessed appointment of Motherhood. It was an honor to share the day with two women who have taken such pride in this task. Two women who have purposed to honor God in and through the inner-workings of their lives as well as their jobs as Mothers. I got to come home and practice the "not so lovely" part of the job and sit on the tub rubbing my Jesse's back as he fought the urge to lose his Cheeseburger Pizza. Poor guy has a headache and tummy-ache, presumably from being worn out from the weekends adventures.
Thank you Lord for allowing me to carry within me these precious gifts, Naomi, Ethan, Jesse and Annah. Thank you for putting within me all that I need to do this job well and love them up good. Thank you for the blessings of good health that you have bestowed on my family. Thank you for always providing for our physical needs, above and beyond what we could imagine. Thank you for giving me the honor of living a life that will show my children who you are and how you love them. Give me the wisdom to now how to train them each in the way they should go so that when they are old they will not part from it. Thank you for giving me a mother who did this for me and continues to show me your heart for me and people in general. I pray that you bless both my parents this year. Bless them with needs met, joys abounded, wounds healed and victories taken. Amen and Amen and Amen.