I remember finding out that I was pregnant again. I'd just miscarried weeks before. I was thrilled and yet fearful. The midwife had told us we should wait a while to try again. Let my body recover. But the "Rythym Method" for me was.. not very effective. My rythym was to be pregnant.
We calculated the due date and found out our baby was due December 25th! What a present! I loved being pregnant. I loved watching my belly grow. I loved the first flutters of movement and that gradually changed to looking like I'd been taken over by an alien. It was amazing. I felt like an alien. It was so foriegn to all of life before. Of course there were things I disliked as well, but looking back.. I'd do it all again.
We stayed at my parents house for Christmas. I don't exactly remember why.. but we stayed a couple of days early as well. We went to bed on the 23rd not expecting what was about to happen. About 2 hours after falling asleep I woke up feeling as if there was something "down there". This freaked me out! In our birthing classes they had warned us that sometimes the cord can begin coming out first.. and then you HAVE to call 911 right away and get on all fours with your rump raised up so that circulation wasn't cut off to the baby's air supply. I frantically woke Bruce and told him he had to look. (the things poor husbands have to find out about their wife because of pregnancy and labor)
When I moved my leg for him to look there was a gush of water. My water had broke! A day before I was due! He asked me what he should do and I said, "I want my mom!". So after taking me to the bathroom he gladly went and woke her. She suggested calling the midwife who said since I wasn't contracting much I should shower, relax and make my way to the hospital which was about 30min away. I was so nervous. I was HAVING a BABY!
Before leaving we opened our Christmas present from my parents early.. it was a camera! They'd got it for us so we could capture the beauty of this miracle. I'm so thankful for photographs. My brain doesn't keep all of life very clearly remembered.
SO, we made it to the hospital about 1:30 or so. I was admitted and told I should get some sleep. After about 4 or 5 hours I was beginning to really feel the contractions. We tried out all sorts of postions to keep me comfortable. Rocking chair. Standing with my arms around his neck. Squatting in front of the couch on towels. But the best was the tub. NOT with the airplane jets on.. just the warm water that alleviated pressure. I remember laying in there breathing through contractions hearing myself making noises that were.. not very ladylike. But completely that of a woman. I am not much into women impowerment.. but I LOVED the feeling of knowing what my body was doing and doing whatever it took to calmly allow that to happen. Later I found out my sister's could hear me in the waiting room. I never screamed mind you... but I sure breathed LOUD!
About 4 or 5 hours into full labor I felt it was time to push. That was the hardest part of this labor. She wasn't nearly as far down as my others were when I began pushing with them. And I remember pushing and feeling her moving and then when I'd quit.. "Schwoop!" she'd go back in. I don't know if someone said this or it was a thought of mine. But it was as if I had to coax her into coming out. Out of what she'd known as her world. Out of that perfect place where she had been formed and grown. Out of that place where I know she dwelt with the Spirit of God. Into a world where she would now have to CHOOSE to do so.
Finally after about an hour, she came out. Beautiful. Amazing. So completely perfect. Our Naomi Noel. All 7lbs 12oz's of her. Although I'd carried her within me for 9mo.. it felt as though after just 6hrs... I was a mother. Mother. What a priveledged title.
As she's grown and we've gone through all of the emotions that parenting bring.. there hasn't been a second where it felt "not worth it". She has always been a joy. Always been a gift. Even when I discovered how much like me she is. Even when we've sat up worried over illness or broken leg, or cut finger, or broken NOSE! She is our treasure. (one of them!)
Now she is turning into a young lady. She is full of energy. Full of life. Full of confidence that I never felt growing up. I remember my mom uused to say that she hoped we'd go further than she does in her life. That by her overcoming things in her life she'd given us a chance to start ahead of where she did. I get that now. And I get to see the fruits of our parents faithfulness mixed with ours provide her with the opportunity and ability to become a strong woman of God.
She won't be 10 for almost another month. But because of her upcoming surgery to fix damage done by a broken nose last spring.. we are throwing her a party early. Last year because of family crisis we had to move her party, as well as Jesse's, to January. This year because of family crisis we are having her party a day early. But the thing is.. she hasn't complained. She hasn't put herself above the needs of the family. This makes us want to be sure to celebrate with her extra hard! ;) So next Friday she is going to take some girlfriends ice skating and have them over for pizza. Then as her Grandparents and Aunts and Uncles are able they are going to celebrate with her.. date her. I love that we have family that wants to be involved in our children's lives. That they love our children enough to value these times with us when they WANT to celebrate with us.
Thank you Jesus for knowing what we needed in an oldest daughter. Thank you for making her resilliant to our shortcomings and pliable to our guiding. Thank you for this amazing gift you've given us in parenting. Help us to always do it to the fullest, with all that you've put within us to do it right. Thank you for making them all so unique and individual. May we always see them as that, training them each in the way THEY should go so that when they are old they won't part from it.
Oh sweetheart, this was so beautiful! I am so glad you are blogging! You are amazing at it! It took me awhile to make it through it because of the tears. What precious memories. Thanks for letting us share them again. Loving you always mom
ReplyDeleteOur girls are pretty amazing. :-) Great job on the post! Your mom was right, you do a great job! Keep up the great work. :-)
ReplyDeleteJohannah